Voting Sh@t

This week, we talked about why it is important to vote. Not just in this election but in all them. But really, in this election bitch! We are at a crossroads: do we elect the first woman President? Do we invest in someone who is depositing our resources into everything we do not stand for? Are we willing to sit this one out, even though it is monumentally important? Gosh I hope you know the answer and I trust that the answer involves you voting by mail or standing in line to cast your ballet.

Marko and I have made our stance clear. While we want you to vote more than we want you to choose our candidate, the think that the choice is quite clear. Vote for someone who cares about you or vote for someone who clearly hates you. It really is that simple. Sorry if you do not feel the same way but recent history has made the path very clear. We wish you all a clear mind while you choose the fate for the rest of us. Vote for lesbians. Vote for gays. Vote for bisexuals and queers. Vote for the tans community. Vote for yourself.

Defining Sh!t

This week, we talked about defining a relationship and all the wonderfully accompanying shit. Why does it take an act of Congress to put words to what you two are doing? You’ve been spending time with one another for weeks but there still isn’t a word that you can agree on? You have been curbing your appetites and expecting your partner to do the same and yet…here we are: in the nebulous, undefined area. Oh 2024, how we hate you ;)

While you try to Define The Relationship, the person you are seeing is desperately attempting to do anything but. Marko and I haven’t been in the scene for a while but we remember what it is like to be ‘half dating’ someone. You deserve better. Anything less than what you want is not what you want. So go ahead; make your needs known. Say what you want. The person who you are meant to be with will meet you right where you are at. Anthing less: girl don’t waste your time!

Game Night Sh!t

This week, we wanted to make the political landscape a little more tolerable. Instead of doing a socially heavy topic or delving into the recesses of what makes relationships challenging, we decided to host a game night with all of you! Who wants to be burdened by the weight of American politics, decimating and global-warming induced weather, or anything super heavy when we can just have some stupid fun with our friends?

Marko and I played a wonderful game with all of you. I hope that you followed the link and sent us a text with your votes! ‘Would You Rather’ is a great, divisive, social experiment of an ice-breaker and we love it! What questions had you screaming while you were driving? Which scenario got your blood pumping while you were on the train? Of all the things we asked, what’s the question that had you wanting to step out of the shower and shout your answer to us? We’d love to hear from you! Your vote counts this and every month. Tell us what you think. You know where to go!

Attachment Sh!t

This week, we talked about attachment theory (sexy, we know!). Which of the established categories do you fall under? Are you secure and feeling safe? Are you anxious and unsure of what’s going to come next? Are you avoidant and we can’t see you? ;) Or are you disorganized and will eventually get to this blog post?!

Unsurprisingly, each of us is a very different mixture of these. Marko said it best on the podcast: a dominant sign with another approach rising. Does that resonant with you? Do you find this to be helpful in understanding your partner(s) and your previous/current relationship? We want to hear from you! Comment below or write in: we are anxious (or secure in waiting) to hear from you. See what I did there? ;)

Arousal Sh!t

This week, we talked about what gets us randy. Are you horny baby?! The topic is as sensitive as an erogenous zone and as important as an orgasm! We discuss what puts us in the mood and how to calibrate for coitus. No surprise here that two different people have two very different sets of standards.

What does it take for you? Are you a romantic who needs to follow a trail of flower petals to a candle-lit bedroom? Are you a pragmatic person who just needs it to be the day of the week you’ve agreed is sexy time? Or is it as simple as a good, stiff breeze to make you…good and stiff? You hear what it takes to get us going. Now we want to hear from you!

Apart Together Sh!t

This week, we give you a brief update on how we spent our summer break. We tried to pack every week full of activities, time with friends, and exploring New York City! Marko and I share more content on the Patreon page, so if you want to hear more of the details, you will have to check it out there!

The topic of the week was an interesting one, diving into a discussion of relationships that do not involve co-habitation. Have you ever heard of this type of coupling? Do you prefer this sort of set up? You might be surprised by how I felt on the subject. You’ll have to listen to find out! Welcome back, listeners. We missed you!

After Care Sh!t

This week, we talked about post-sex after care and all the things you should request for yourself and can do for your partner. I’m curious to know how many of you were already practicing this debriefing of debauchery and how many were surprised to find it resonating. I pride myself on being a present lover but admittedly found that there were things I could be doing differently and better.

We would love to hear from you on this topic. As you know, we are taking the next couple of months off, as we usually do to go enjoy life and refill the coffers so that we have more meaningful content to bring you. We wish you the happiest of pride celebrations and hope that you take time for yourselves and each other, whether that is coitus care or self-care. We look forward to hearing from you!

Long D!stance Sh!t

This week, we talked about long distance relationships and how to make them work. Or how to determine that they are not working for you ;) What are your thoughts on LDRs and is there any way to make them work? The research says that there is, that they are common, and that they lead to positive outcomes. I am just as surprised as you are!

We would love to hear from you, especially if you ever faced the challenges presented by a further from home connection. What did you have to do to make it work? Did you ultimately move or have you continued to thrive, despite the miles? Marko and I did it for a while but coming back together physically and proximally made all the difference. Could we have continued to be successful far apart longer? You’ll have to let us know ;)

Boyfriend D!ck Sh!t

This week, we talked about the difference between ‘boyfriend dick’ and ‘hook-up dick.’ What did you all think? Is this a phenomenon that you can identify with? Have YOU ever seen a dick and said, “where do you think you are putting that thing!?” We heard from Marko that he certainly has!

Personally, I don’t care about the size or makeup of the parts: I care about the quality of the person. Give me lengthy conversations, girthy knowledge, and depth of character ;) But am I alone in this? Is there anyone else out there who can identify with what I’m packing? We’d love to hear from you!

Threesome Sh!t

This week, we talked about threesomes in committed relationships and what blurred the lines between monogamy, monogam-ish, and outright open relationships. It was an eye-opening discussion in which Marko and Tony may or may not have moved someone into their bed!

Not really ;) But it did lead to some interesting exploration of our boundaries, what society expects, and what we are going to define our own relationship on. If you haven’t already, give it a listen and let us know what you think! What works for you? Do you consider a ‘one time’ trist to be relationship-defining or is it a free pass? For our Patreon members, there was further discussion of what celebrities would serve as a ‘hall pass.’ We’d love to hear from you, either on our personal list or your own! Comment below or send your thoughts via email or the Listener Sh!tuations page. Hope to hear from you!

Pet Names Sh!t

This week, we talked about pet names and whether you use them or find them revolting. We are going to do something different with this week’s blog…

Leave your best and worst pet names in the comments below! Most creative and most egregious wins a prize!

It’s Just Money Sh!t

This week, we revisited an oldie but a goodie: the concept of money, budgeting, and resource allocation overall. You know, the #1 reason that people get divorced. No reason to go back to this, right?

It is interesting how much we progress and evolve over time, isn’t it? Marko and I are both in very, very tangible and noticeably different places with this issue. I have loosened my choke-like grip on the pursestrings while Marko has dialed back his spending considerably. We are both working towards a middle ground, where we save and plan for the future but enjoy and live in the present. I can honestly say that I never thought I would spend money as much as I have these past few years but it has been fun and well worth it! We have traveled, we have had amazing dinners and seen incredible shows, and yet we have managed to still save for our retirement. I can honestly say that I am truly at peace with where we are at now: a real balance of ‘now’ and ‘soon to be.’

What about you, listeners? Have you changed your relationship with money? Are you working on enjoying today while planning for retirement? We would love to hear from you! Comment below, please :)

Sleeping with Friends Sh!t

This week, we talked about the very queer experience of sleeping with your friends. It’s such a hot topic for our queer community. Have you ever slept with a friend? What do you think of the concept? We are dying to hear from you, dear listeners!

Marko has never engaged in this type of behavior. No real surprise there ;) I, Tony, may have had a dalliance or two. Who knows ;) But what about you, loyal fans? Do you think that it is okay to engage in sexual congress with someone you laugh with on a Thursday night? Can you copulate with a co-worker? Is this type of activity allowed? We’d love to hear from you, friends of the podcast. What are the socially acceptable ‘does’ and don’t’ of penis in pals? Write below and let us know!

1-1-1-1 Rule Sh!t

This week, we talked about a fun little concept: 1-1-1-1. It means taking a one-week vacation without anyone else, including kids (if you have them); having one date night per week without distractions; once a week, each partner initiates sexual intimacy; and one block of 30 minutes without screen time every night. Seems simple enough, right?

Marko and I are going to commit to trying this for the entirety of next month. We would love it If you could join us and do the same in your relationship. We will report back on how things went, our thoughts, feelings, and how it affected us. It would be great if you could respond to this post, write, or leave us a voice message and let us know how it was for you as well! As always, we would really like to hear from you :)

Sh!tuationships

This week, we talked about ‘situationships,’ which is a relatively new term for me. I totally get the concept and I’m 100% on board with the fact that they happen. As you may have heard on the episode, though, I’m a bit conflicted as to whether they are a normal part of relationship development or are a new phenomenon.

What do you think, listeners? I’d love to hear from as many of you across a multitude of generations so that we can figure out whether this is something novel or is just a new package for an old product. Is it normal for young people to couple up without putting a bunch of words to what they are doing? Does this dating status mark a new evolution in how we relate to each other? I’m curious to hear what you think and feel about this. Please write to us!

Love is Blind Sh!t

This week, we talked about whether love is actually blind or if we can, in fact, go into a new relationship with our eyes wide open. Welcome back to a new season, dear listeners. What do you think? Are we wearing rose-colored glasses or are we beyond being newborns?

We discussed the idea and the reality. Are we walking into new situations with the same baggage or are we bringing wisdom with us? Did you come into a new situation with a new approach? Are we all starting over each time? Did the Critellis get anywhere this week? ;) Let us know what you think!

Goal-Setting Sh!t

This week, we talked about effective ways to set goals as individuals and couples. I found the articles to be of particularly good quality so if you haven’t had a change to give them a read, do yourself a favor and follow the links in the show notes. While there is a lot of information out there on the topic, my husband did a really good job finding ones that are accessible and concrete!

How do you do with setting and achieving goals, overall? Are you steadfast and always moving forward, with your eyes on the next step as you complete the current one, like Marko? Or are you like me and so many others: do you set a goal for the new year, start out strong, and then lose your momentum and fall back into old habits? We would love to hear from you on this, dear listeners. Feel free to comment below!

Body Hair Sh!t

This week, we talked about preferences related to body hair. What do you prefer: a smooth, soft surface or a rugged, hairy man? Marko and I discussed the matter at length. It’s no surprise that he likes manly men or that I enjoy “a clean working space.” We’ve always had our preferences and they haven’t really changed over time. What about you, dear listeners? Have you always wanted what you like or have your preferences changed over time?

For me, I’ve always been more interested in the androgyny aspect of things. I prefer to have those arbitrary lines blurred, to see feminine men or masculine women. I don’t know what that’s about. Maybe I just like to bend the rules and challenge norms. Perhaps it is something deeper. “The world may never know,” as the advertisement from my youth intimates. We would love to hear your varied, disparate responses on this divisive topic. You know that we love a good argument here ;)

Competitive Sh!t

This week, we talked about being competitive within your own relationship. Do you and your partner compete against each other? Do you revel when your husband fails? Does your girlfriend secretly smile when she does better than you? Are there any such unhealthy dynamics at work in your relationship? If so, stay tuned because we explore the topic thoroughly!

Then, on Patreon, we talk about tips to help you address these issues. Marko and I also do a bit of an inventory of what applies to us and what we’ve been fortunate enough to avoid. We’d love to hear your thoughts on the topic and any techniques that you have found to be effective. We had an amazing time talking this week and it shows! Laugh with us and give it a listen. We hope you enjoy ;)

Talk Dirty Sh!t

This week, we talked about dirty talk. Or discussed talking dirty. OK, we talked dirty. To you, our listeners. Ha ha ha we hope that you enjoyed it ;) Please let us know how we did and what we can do to make you happier ;)

Seriously though, what do you think about talking dirty to your partner? How do you feel about that partner talking dirty to you? What are your ‘splooshes’ and which are your ‘ickes’? To each their own, right? Marko and I have had many years to figure out what works for us. Did you disagree strongly with any of our stances?